Forbidden Desire
by Trillian Astra
Summary: Mild SylarMohinder slash. Unrequited feelings only. Please read and review. Disclaimer: I don't own Heroes. Comprendez?


**Author's Note: Well, this is my very first piece of Heroes fanfiction. It's only short, but I've read a few Mohinder/Sylar pieces and I think the idea is an interesting one, so I thought I'd give it a try. There's nothing physical here, so though it is slash it's very mild. Please read and review, it's always appreciated.**

**Oh, and you will notice that I call Sylar Gabriel. I think this is more appropriate in the situation, seeing as Gabriel is his name, after all.**

**Disclaimer: In no way do I own Heroes, Mohinder or Sylar. This is not written for profit, merely enjoyment. **

Gabriel – or Zane, as he was calling himself for now – and Mohinder had been searching for the people on the list for a couple of weeks, driving all over the United States and staying in roadside motels each night. At the moment they were heading to the location of the next person, who lived in a small town just outside Portland, and because it was getting late they decided to stop at a motel for the night and find this new person in the morning.

They had stopped to grab a sandwich each already, so when they saw the Sunshine Motel from the road, they decided to pull in and get a couple of rooms. The Vacancy sign was illuminated, and soon they were asking the desk receptionist for rooms. Unfortunately, she said, the only room left was a twin. She asked if they still wanted the room, and Mohinder looked at his watch. It told him it was gone midnight, so he looked up at his companion.

"Zane? Do you mind having a twin room?"

Gabriel hesitated for a moment, he didn't know if he felt comfortable sharing a room with Mohinder. They were travelling together, but they still barely knew one another – a good thing for him, 'Zane' thought. "Uh, I don't know… a twin room has two separate beds, right?"

"Yes, it will. But we can go somewhere else if you like."

"No, no it'll be fine. It's getting late, and we might not find somewhere with two rooms free at this time of night."

"Well, all right then." Mohinder turned to the receptionist. "We'll take the room, thank you."

She started to enter his details into her computer, he paid for the room, and she handed over two room keys. The two men took their bags and headed for room 27, when Mohinder opened the door. Inside there were indeed two beds, together with a couch and old TV set in one corner, and the door to a small bathroom in another.

Mohinder looked around the room, then resigned himself to the fact that it was this or another night in the car and put his bag down on one of the beds. Gabriel came in behind him, shut the door, and put his own bag down next to the second bed. He started to open the bag, then stopped and looked up at his friend.

_Odd that I think of him as a friend, when I have only known him for a few weeks. There's just something about him…_

"Mohinder, what are we going to do about showers, and undressing?" He saw confusion flash across the other man's face, before he answered.

"We can take turns with the shower, and I suppose we shall just have to agree not to look while we dress and undress.", he said with a small smile.

"Of course. That's fine" _No, no it's not fine…tell him, tell him that you can't drag your eyes away from him, tell him how beautiful he is…_Gabriel gave his head a tiny shake to silence the little voice in the back of his head, hoping that Mohinder would not notice his odd behaviour.

But he needn't have worried, as Mohinder was in the tiny bathroom going through his usual nighttime routine. Gabriel took the chance to quickly undress and change into a white t-shirt and a pair of shorts, so when his companion emerged he slipped into the bathroom to brush his teeth. He was soon getting into bed, and as Mohinder was changing he turned to face away from him to allow him some privacy.

At least, that was the plan. Mohinder had his back turned, so he did not know "Zane" was watching him with eyes half-closed. As he pulled his t-shirt off over his head, Gabriel had a rare chance to admire his well-toned body. He slid under the cover of his own bed, and then Gabriel turned over, so that he would not suspect anything.

But when Mohinder turned off the light on the table between the beds, he turned again, and lay awake staring at his companion, taking in every detail of his hair, that fell in dark curls around his face and was highlighted by the moonlight coming through the window, and the long eyelashes that now rested on his cheeks and fluttered occasionally as he dreamt. He ran his eyes over every inch of the Indian's body, imagining those parts that were hidden by the covers and wishing that he could do that with his hands instead. Wishing that there wasn't so much space between them, wishing that they were sharing a bed and that he could sleep wrapped in Mohinder's strong arms.

_Why do I feel like this? I can't feel like this, I shouldn't feel like this… but how can anything that feels so good be wrong? I want him, but part of me knows that I can't have him. I'm not the person he thinks I am. I'm a killer, a murderer, a liar. I felt so uncomfortable when he spoke about his father, and about the way his father died. He thinks "Sylar" is in jail. What would he do if he knew that his father's killer is right here, lying awake in the bed next to his?_

_He would kill me, I know. He has a gun, hidden in his bag. I found it by accident last week. I doubt he has ever used it, he's too gentle for that, but if he finds out who – what – I am, he will kill me. And then he will never know how I feel._

_Sometimes, sometimes I want to break down at his feet and confess everything. Tell him who I really am, tell him everything I've done, tell him how I feel, and throw myself on his mercy. But I won't. I can't. I know that. Mohinder Suresh may be a beautiful human being, but he will never be mine._

_I must content myself with moments like this, when I can be so close to him and imagine what it would feel like to touch his lovely skin and run my hands over his body. Moments like this are all I have of him, and I shall treasure each one._

Gabriel got up, slowly, silently, making sure he did nothing to wake Mohinder. He stood at his friend's bedside, drinking in his beauty, then he slowly crouched down and oh-so-gently laid a kiss on his forehead. Mohinder let out a soft sigh as he did so, but did not wake. Gabriel was about to return to his own bed, when he realised that he might never have this opportunity again, and turned back to kiss him softly on the lips. Then he got into bed, and tried to get to sleep.

The last thought he had before he finally drifted off was _Good night, Mohinder Suresh. May you never know what it is that I am. I love you, Mohinder._


End file.
